My body is like a credit card. I'm hovering around my limit, but I want to keep charging. Or rather, eating. I need to lose twenty pounds. And while I appreciate the benefits of breastfeeding, losing a mere pound a week is losing its luster. Problem is, I love food. I love wine. I love dessert. Those aren't really the problems. This is ~ I haven't seen the inside of a gym in over a year. And it's winter, so being outside is limited (not b/c I am wimp, but b/c I have my kids all day every day). Or maybe I'm being a little bit of a wimp. I JUST NEED TO GET INTO A NEW ROUTINE! And not get thrown b/c my kids were up tag teaming me all night (which happened last night). Money's slightly an issue so joining an actual gym isn't on the table, but last time I checked, my tennis shoes worked anywhere and everywhere. They didn't only magically turn on inside a gym (but wouldn't that be a stellar excuse). Really, I just want to walk and do some Pilate's. Maybe use the Wii Fit. I think 'Just Dance' would be fun and burn away some unwanted calories. And my 3.5 yo could have a blastie too.
I have this 'today's the day' mentality, but I'm stuck in an rut right now. And what's so irritating is that I know (and I mean, I KNOW) how much better I would feel after a nice power walk or Pilate's workout. I believe in exercise. It is my friend. So I guess that makes me one of the worst friends ever since I never visit, call, or even text. Exercise must be like, "WTF, I didn't do anything but bring joy and satisfaction into your life and this is how you treat me?" Good point, exercise, good point.
So maybe tomorrow's the day since let's face it, today's almost over. I'll finish this day and be done, just like the great Ralph Waldo Emerson once said. Time to cut up this credit card and get to paying off this debt. It's a heavy burden (literally)...and I'm over it. So good-bye baby weight debt, hello healthy momma. Who knows, maybe I'll actually look forward to putting on a bathing suit this summer.
Peace. J
Sometimes when i read your wonderful blogs, it sounds like an exaact journal entry i would make at the exact same time! I miss writing too....used to be sooo good at keeping loong journals. Love this entry... So, If it helps, I feel EXACTLY the same way right now...I used to be a "gym rat" obsessed with pilates and elliptical and went to classes at night after work at like 8pm....ha! Now that's called make dinner, feed dinner, do baths, storytime, songtime and prayer time! How life changes. I am most certainly finding it's quite difficult with babies to keep any sort of routine, ESP when they are so young and it's so freezing outside...oh yeah and my damn disc herniations that were gifted upon me in my 30s after carrying, having, breeding and literally carrying 2 babes. It's hard to get back on a routine! ESP after all my body's been through! That famous Jillian lose weight guru chick actually says she will never have kids of cause it what it does to her body....talk about vain and overboard! but alas, this is a stage...someday we will get a routine down again, we will be totally in shape, and we won't be up 3x a night with babies and then up for good at 6am with no time for showers...dirty diapers, hungry, sick and screaming babies come first!
ReplyDeleteLove your new blog...very thought-inspiring...thank u! Love, Tanya